


Garbage Man

by blissfulrain12



Category: Gravity Falls, Rick and Morty
Genre: Buried Alive, Evil Stanley Pines, Mob Boss AU, Original Character Death(s), the Stanchez is only implied
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:47:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8653174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blissfulrain12/pseuds/blissfulrain12
Summary: Stanley Pines has a shovel but he isn't digging for buried treasure.





	

Stan landed Rick’s spaceship with practiced ease. He no longer even paused to take in the view of Earth from it’s moon any longer. He’d long ago become acquainted with it. After all this was his favorite dumping grounds. He slipped the specially designed helmet over his head and pushed the button that would create a forcefield around his body to protect it. Stepping out of the pilot’s chair he made sure to grab the laser shovel from the seat next to him. He rested the shovel on his shoulder and made his way around to the back of the ship. Popping open the trunk he stared down at the alien as ze blinked back up at him. They had worked together for years but Hlphedax had gotten greedy and everyone knew if they crossed Rick Sanchez he’d sic The Grim on them. When Stan was given a name he’d make sure they’d meet they’re end. 

The alien’s six limbs were secured to its exoskeleton with an ample amount of good old fashioned duct tape. Stan grabbed onto Hlphedax and heaved zem out of the trunk. Unfortunately for zem zir exoskeleton was thick enough for zem to survive for a while in the thin atmosphere. With Hlphedax on the ground Stan changed his grip dragging the ex mobster by zir bound legs. The alien tried to struggle and scream but between the duct tape and Stan’s own strength ze might as well have been doing nothing.

“Doo dee doo looking for a good spot,” Stan sang to himself as he walked around passing by marks he’d left signalling a spot was already taken. Finally he came across a crater that wasn’t too steep that he’d have trouble getting out of it. With a swing of his arm he threw Hlphedax over the rim and watched as ze tumbled down before sliding down after zem. Once at the bottom Stan turned on the shovel and started digging. The alien began struggling even harder and screaming with all zir might behind the tape.

“Doo dee doo digging a grave,” Stan just sang louder to drown zem out. He wasn’t sure why they bothered with all the noise. There was no one who could hear them. There never was and they had to know it. Stan was well known for making people disappear without a trace. Turned out he had a real talent for wet work and not just the sailing kind. 

After reaching the right depth and length for the hole Stan carefully turned the laser shovel off. He vaulted out of the grave and switched Hlphedax for the shovel. Hlphedax had stopped struggling instead ze was making a high pitched clicking sound that Stan was pretty sure was zir species equivalent of crying. He couldn’t blame zem very few people didn’t cry when they got to this point. He lay Hlphedax down gently into zir grave before retrieving his shovel.

“I’d close your eyes for this part if I was you. Dirt in the eyes is real painful. For what it’s worth I’m gonna miss you buddy. It was real nice working with ya. Too bad ya had to go and upset Rick like that. Squealing to the galactic fed like that, what were ya thinkin?” With that said Stan turned the laser shovel back on and started heaping dirt back into the grave. “Doo dee doo burying Hlph.”

He finished the grave by using the shovel to mark it so he knew not to dig in this crater again. Making his way back to Rick’s space ship Stan reflected a little on his life a little. It wasn’t filled with the type of ships, digging, adventure, or genius companion he’d dreamt about as kid but it certainly had riches. Even if he was pretty sure he’d end up in an unmarked grave on some desolate rock himself one day he couldn’t really complain he’d gotten what he’d wished for.  

**Author's Note:**

> So this happened because I couldn't get the image of Stan singing to himself as he got rid of someone out of my head. I hope you enjoyed.


End file.
